so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
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