ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
