thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
either way he was missing a nipple.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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