Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
