I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
i am craving dick and cupcakes
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
