I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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