Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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