Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
