If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Randomize
