i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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