it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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