hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
