Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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