We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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