Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
