idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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