Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
