Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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