At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
