...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize