dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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