why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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