I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
