I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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