Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
