no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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