their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize
