Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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