reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
