This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
