I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Randomize
