I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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