the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
