Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
