big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
