butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
