Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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