You work out of a Hotel?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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