I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
