I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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