please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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