He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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