I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
