im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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