Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
