I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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