it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
