So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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