Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Randomize
