OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Randomize
